Tuesday, June 5, 2012

learning to love.

I have always been told... "In order to truly love someone, you must first love yourself".

Lately this runs across my mind very often. I regularly wonder if I really love myself, and question if I am "ready" to love someone else.

Looking back at my life this past year, tears come to my eyes as I realize how much I have changed; how much I have grown. Sometimes I almost feel ashamed for measuring my worth, and progression based on the things of this world as opposed to my relationship with my Heavenly Father. I wish it didn't take countless sleepless nights and buckets of tears to realize and remember what I have known my entire life. He is proud of me, and he does love me. Therefore, I should feel the exact same way. He knows me. He knows my weaknesses, and through trying them he gives me opportunity to create strengths. That, I am grateful for.

Although I may wish I was 20 pounds lighter, three shades darker, and years further in my education... I would be foolish to measure the woman I have become based on such worldly accomplishments. I know I am a daughter of my Heavenly Father. Jesus Christ created me. He gave me a strong, healthy body that I am so grateful for. He blessed me with friends and family who love me for the dork I am. He trusts me. He has given me leaders who have taught me so much. He has placed, oh so perfectly, the people in my life. Especially this past year, I can honestly say, that every person in my life has been placed there for a specific reason, whether they know it or not. He sent me to Texas to gain some of the most important education I could possibly gather throughout this life. He put me here to become the woman I am to become.

At the temple tonight, with a prayer in my heart, I hoped to find answers. I left feeling amazing as usual, but still answerless. An hour ago I figured it out. I already knew the answer. His spirit was enough of a reminder for me. He does love me. I love me. He gave me, "me". For that I can't thank Him enough. This is just one step of my journey. The best part is...  He has already walked the path, and has left his footsteps for me to follow.